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FAQ
Here is 50 stupid questions that I have answered by me personally.
Q: IS THERE AN FAQ?
A: No.
Q: IF A MONKEY BITES ME, WHAT DRUGS DO I TAKE?
A: Don't do drugs, kid.
Q: DO YOU THINK I WILL EVER GET MARRIED?
A: No.
Q: WHY NOT?
A: Because you are just some guy who exists only to ask questions. Suprise!
Q: ARE YOU GOING TO EAT ME?
A: Nah, I don't eat junk food.
Q: ARE YOU GOING TO EAT THAT?
A: No, soap is not something I like to eat. But you can have it if you'd like.
Q: THANKS! HOW WILL I EVER REPAY YOU?
A: Buy me a bar of soap. I'm fresh out.
Q: OW! I STUBBED MY TOE! WHAT DO I DO?!
A: Dip your toe in boiling water. It works it like a charm.
Q: IF YOU AND MY DOG SKIP GOT IN A FIGHT, WHO WOULD WIN?
A: Me, cause Erin Brockovich would be distracting good ol' Skip.
Q: YOU HAVE A SICK MIND, DON'T YOU?
A: GENIUS! You figured that out in only 9 questions! You get a sticker.
Q: GIVE ME 100 BUCKS, OKAY?
A: Sorry, I left it in my other pockets.
Q: WHY DOES THIS SOAP TASTE SO BAD?
A: It usually tastes like whipped cream, so it must have gone bad. I'm sorry, but you have 2 weeks to live.
Q: NO!!!! CAN IT BE????
A: Yes, it can be.
Q: MAN, HARRY POTTER'S NOT A TRUE STORY, RIGHT?
A: Actully, yes it is.
Q: IT IS?!
A: Yes. Oh, and by the way, Lord Voldemort's next target is you.
Q: SO WILL I DIE FROM THE ROTTEN SOAP OR FROM LORD VOLDEMORT?
A: Whichever comes first.
Q: OW!!!! A BURNED MY TOE FROM THE BOILNG WATER!!! WAS THIS SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN?!
A: Yes. You no longer have to worry about the subby-toe feeling, now do you?
Q: IS IT TRUE THAT IT TAKES REAL PEOPLE TO EAT TIM'S POTATO CHIPS?
A: Yes, therefore you cannot eat them.
Q: WHY ARE YOU SO MEAN TO ME?
A: Because you are not a real person and you do not have feelings.
Q: WHY DON'T I HAVE A COMB?
A: Cause you are bald, baldy.
Q: CAN I GO TO THE PARTY?
A: Yes, but don't be suprised if there is a mad axe-man waiting there for you.
Q: WHY WOULD THERE BE A MAN AXE MAN THERE?
A: I sent him there so you couldn't go! You are much too young to be out this late.
Q: HOW OLD AM I?
A: I just created you a 20 minutes ago.
Q: ARE YOU FEELING OK?
A: Yes I am. How about you?
Q: I FEEL LIKE A STRESS BALL AFTER BEING SQUEEZED! WHAT'S GOING ON?
A: I think the rotten soap is kicking in.
Q: WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE TV SHOW?
A: The Special Show
Q: WHAT CHANNEL IS THAT ON?
A: The Special Channel.
Q: HOW DO I GET IT?
A: Stand in the middle of a busy intersection, wrapped in tinfoil with your arms up in the air.
Q: WHAT IS CASTLE INFINITY?
A: An interactive computer game.
Q: HOW DO I GET IT?
A: Dress up as a hobo and beg for it in the streets.
Q: DOES IT REQUIRE INTERNET ACCESS?
A: Yes!
Q: HOW DO I GET THAT?
A: Beg for that too!
Q: AM I ALLOWED?
A: Yes.
Q: AM I STLL ALLOWED?
A: Yes.
Q: AM I STILL ALLOWED?
A: You are now allowed to sit in your room and do nothing, but nothing else.
Q: WHO IS BUMBALO BILL?
A: Your dad.
Q: WHY IS HE MY DAD?
A: Cause he doesn't exist, just like you!
Q: DO YOU LIKE BUTTERSCOTCH?
A: God no.
Q: WHY NOT?
A: Cause it has the same ingredients as rotten soap.
Q: WHAT QUESTION IS THIS?
A: Number 40.
Q: DO YOU HAVE A NUTCRACKER I CAN BURROW?
A: No, but don't worry, when you eat rotten soap you start seeing them all over the place!
Q: WHAT'S YOUR REAL NAME?
A: Wile E. Coyote.
Q: WOW! CAN I HAVE YOUR AUTOGRAPH?
A: No.
Q: WHY NOT?
A: Cause you don't exist, I don't give autographs out to non-existant people.
Q: HAVE YOU EVER SEEN "LORD OF THE RINGS"?
A: Yes.
Q: DID YOU KNOW I'M IN IT?
A: Yes, you are the Evil Nougat Guy! Cause you don't exist!
Q: DID YOU KNOW MY WEBSITE IS WAY COOLER THAN YOURS?
A: Yes! I heard it was called www.coolestsiteintheworld.com, only available on the pretend world wide web made of of Play-doh.
Q: DO NON-EXISTANT PEOPLE GET DANDRUFF?
A: Nobody but you.
Q: HOW DO I GET RID OF MY DANDRUFF?
A: Dip your head in boiling water, it works!
Q: OUCH! I BURNT MY SCALP OFF!!! WAS THIS SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN?!
A: Yes, now there is no more dandruff, and well as no more scalp!
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